In Montréal

I’m in Montréal right now. Today is the first day of a conference that I am attending.  As I was getting ready for this trip, I realized that Katie has never been to Montréal before! Okay, so I have been to Montréal many times, just not as Katie. It’s time to take her there!

I had been stopped on Highway 401 for 15 minutes before I took this picture.

The original plan was for me to drive to Montréal mid-afternoon, and stopping occasionally to shop for clothes and shoes, and to take pictures along the route. Reality, on the other hand, deviated far from the plan. First, there was the rain…lots and lots of it too, which made stopping for pictures nearly impossible. Then there was the heavy traffic, first from Pickering to Oshawa, then through Brockville, which made shopping shops also impossible—I didn’t want to arrive in Montréal too late.

The water tower in Iroquois, Ontario, near the border with the province of Quebec.

I did (or at least my car did) finally managed to outrun the rain when I passed through the township of Iroquois, Ontario, at which point I was able to have my pictures taken. By the time I arrived at the hotel, it was very late already, and I went to Schwartz’s for their famed smoked meat sandwich and promptly went to bed.  All in all, it took me a very long 7 1/2 hours to drive to Montréal. (I’ve never had to spend more than 5 hours before…)

Beautiful sunset east of Iroquois, ON

Tomorrow I’ll see if I can sneak into one of the sessions as a smartly dressed woman attending the conference.  Daring, I know, and manipulating my credentials to say “Kaitlyn Young” isn’t even remotely difficult…but this is probably too weird even for me to do.  Today I will definitely try my best to go stroll around town, and if the weather stays dry, have pictures taken.  Of the pictures that I have taken along the way, I’ll post them after doing some minor edits. some of them are now posted with this post and on my Web Gallery and Flickr after some major digital editing…

Help me Help Myself

It’s the second week of April, which means we’re already three weeks into spring. Or at least, it is springtime in many parts of the world, except in the southern hemisphere, and well, here in many parts of Canada. In fact, in Toronto, we still have no solid confirmation that spring has indeed arrived, although the the temperature is a balmy 19°C today, we had been below freezing at night all of last week. But it’s enough to encourage me to pack in all my winter clothes, and get my spring clothes out of storage. It also means it’s time to think about losing my winter….deposits. It was fine when when I was all bundled up in thick jackets, but now that spring is here, but I really don’t want to look fat in my dresses this year. The other reason is that I’m a cyclist, and every pound I can lose translate to longer distances and faster speeds that I can sustain. (My “less important” reason related to cycling is that I have wanted to bike only wearing my sports bra and shorts, and I really, really don’t want my flabby guts.)

So, here’s my plan. Right now, I’m at 156lb—not hopeless for a girl who is 5’9” (175cm) tall—and I’m hoping to go down to 145lb by the end of May. Eventually, I want to be at 140lb, but not just 140lb, I want to be at a healthy 140lb. Over the next few weeks, I’ll be paying special attention to the food that I eat. That means more veggies and less meat (or just less food altogether), lower calories and less fat, more anti-oxidants and nutrients. I’ll also exercise very frequently, like cycling to work, lots of aerobics, and lots of abs exercises.

You can help me help myself by sending your kind encouragements to me, and I’ll in turn, post some “before and after” pictures on my blog.

Temporarily Unavailable

This morning I temporarily deleted a number of my posts on this blog.  The main reason has to do with recent harassment that I’ve received regarding some of the things I wrote about, so this is mainly just a precaution. Deleting anything from my blog is always disappointing, since I have spent a lot of time writing them, and then spending even more time translating them into Chinese.  Of course, the posts aren’t actually “deleted”, just marked “private” so that only I can see them.  I do hope to have some of the posts back online in the future, but as of now, I’m not holding my breath. I am indeed hoping that this will happen in the near future.


Is This Sexy Enough?

The result after using Photoshop for a few hours.

One thing that I’ve always dreamed about is to have a perfect female body, at least one that’s well proportioned enough so that I can look reasonably good walking along a beach wearing only a bikini swimsuit.  (I would be lying if I tell you that I’ve never imagined myself as a bride on my wedding day, walking down the aisle wearing just a veil, stockings and heels, but that’s a whole other story for another time.)  Which is why having this picture taken means a lot to me.  As you can imagine, being a transgender woman who is not on hormone treatment means that the shape of my body isn’t quite “right.”  But while I’m clothed, I can tuck and tug and pad and hide, and then choose appropriate clothes that gives the appearance of the female curves, once the clothes are off, and I’m wearing next to nothing, it’s not a very pretty sight.

Which brings me back to this picture.  I can honestly say that when I had this taken, I didn’t feel good about myself…at least not about the shape of my body.  But it turned out a lot better.  I was able to hide my narrower hips, the edges of the breastforms, my bulging…umm…gut, and my make up looked okay too.  And after a bit of digital retouching, even the flaws in my skin are gone too.

In case you are wondering, the picture was taken with the camera mounted on a tripod.  There was no one else with me.

Fighting Urges

Change Lingerie
Change Lingerie
Can you resist trying out all these bras?

I was driving towards downtown yesterday, and when I got to the Yonge and Eglinton area, I came across the storefront of Change (a relatively new lingerie chain here in Canada). As I looked at the mannequin, all of a sudden I had this urge to go inside and get myself some new lingerie. Except I knew that it was completely unreasonable: I have plenty, and I wasn’t planning on undressing in front of anyone either. Why then? Admittedly, all the bras and panties that I could see were all very pretty, and of course I want to wear all of them!

Thankfully, I was brought back to reality when I looked forward again, remember how cold the weather is in Toronto, and that sexy lingerie is pretty useless in this climate, thus sparing me from making a stupid purchase…

A Weighty Appendix

You may notice that I did not update my website at all in November, but I have also been absent from Facebook and other online presence at well.  Part of the reason for that is that I had been extremely busy at work: research work just doesn’t get done on its own. I had also taken time to visit my family in Hong Kong. But the most important reason is that I just had my appendix removed.  Ouch.

I went to the Toronto General Hospital a few weeks ago with acute appendicitis.  The previous morning, I had woken up with intense pain in my abdomen, but since it wasn’t localized, I didn’t relate that with any possibility of appendicitis, and after taking a single Advil, I actually felt good enough to bike to the library downtown…15km away.  (As an aside, a girl in full cycling clothes, riding a racing bicycle is hot, even if she’s riding in pain.)  It wasn’t until the next day that the pain had returned, and I was admitted to the hospital. Thankfully, it was a quiet night at the ER, and the blood test, the urine test, the ultrasound and the surgery itself only took a few hours, and I was able to return home in less than a day.

In the following week, my complete lack of appetite meant shedding an impressive 8 lbs.  Despite that though, my belly felt more swollen than ever.  A bit of explanation is necessary.  In order to do the surgery, the doctors had to pump some carbon dioxide gas into my abdomen, and there is always something left inside after the procedure.  Anyway, the swelling made it almost impossible for me to straighten my back.  Of course, being the outdoorsy girl that I am, instead of staying home and resting in bed, I walked everywhere with a cane.  A thought did come though: I really ought to pay attention to my weight.  As you can see in my recent summer photos, I had indeed been putting on some weight in my mid section.


Fortunately, I found this iPhone app called “Lose It!” that keeps track of my weight.  And this little free app also contains nutritional information about a lot of supermarket and restaurant food so I can track my calorie intake.  And, it has guidelines on how much calories I can burn with a wide range of exercises.  For example, under “Music Playing”, it says that “conducting” a choir or orchestra burns you 108 calories/hour.  Not bad.  As for “Sexual Activity” though, “Active, vigorous” levels only burns 36 calories/hour.

So for the past few weeks, with this little app, I’ve actually kept the weight off.  The next step, is to step up with my winter exercises.  So hopefully, it’s bye bye gut, hello smaller dresses!

Kate is Going Bilingual

Notice the side bar, there is now a language selector.  Select “Chinese (Traditional)”, and you’ll get an almost empty version of my site.  Here’s what’s going on:

After my recent trip to Hong Kong—I’ll write about that later—I realized that there is an entire community of t-girls out there on the other side of the globe, beyond this small but growing group here in Toronto.  During this trip, I had the opportunity to correspond with a couple of girls in HK, and found out a few things about the goings-on there.  One of the things that I did was to sign up for a web-based forum for Hong Kong crossdressers and transgendered girls.  Well, as it turns out, most of the posts on the forum are in Chinese, and as it turns out, going back to writing in Chinese wasn’t so difficult after all these years of writing only in English.  So, as I flew back to Toronto, I decided that I am going to start posting in both Chinese and English, which will be a bit of an adventure.  The first post to be translate will be this one!

One day, when I can comfortably write in French, I hope to do that too.

This too

This came from that same website, Sexy Loser.  The comics on this site really is very perverted, and I’m not sure what the appeal is, other than the liberal amount of weird sex.  I did come across another strip that has a transgender overtone.  Although I’m glad to say that:

  1. my parents have not disowned me because I’m transgender,
  2. I have no suicidal tendencies,
  3. I’m not about to give someone a blow job.

Also I’m not sure why the guy in the red vest has to jump off a cliff himself at the end.

I found this somewhere

As an interesting segue from my last post:

I found this comic on the internet yesterday.  I can’t remember how I came across it originally—it may have been through browsing someone else’s website.  Nevertheless, I thought it was kind of funny.  The name of the website, Sexy Losers, was a bit unfortunate, and the website has a lot of graphic depiction of sex acts that are just perverted and gross.  This one is no less explicit, but I couldn’t helped by to wonder curiously, if I were a post-op, and my lover doesn’t know of my past, what would I have said?  That said, the reality is that this will never happen… Continue reading “I found this somewhere”

Gallery is UP!

I finally have a gallery installed on my website!  Perhaps in the future, I won’t have to rely so much on Flickr and other services, seeing that I actually have my own servers without serious limits on the number of pictures I am allowed to have!  You can click on “Gallery” on the website or go to  Right now, the gallery works fine in Firefox, but when I look at it with Google Chrome, it has some problems displaying the thumbnails, so that’s something I hope to fix soon, if it is even possible. In the future, I’ll start working on customizing the look of the gallery, but for now, I’ll just start posting all my pictures.  Please take the time to comment and rate them!